Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Whatever I do

"So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, 
do all to the glory of God" 
: 1 Corinthians 10:31
That is the verse that came rushing into my head about two weeks ago.
Sometimes God's direction in my life comes slowly:  piece by piece. Other times I have felt the weight of conviction so heavily upon my heart that I know exactly what needs to be done. 

As human beings when we feel physical pain or are struggling with physical issues it can have a direct connection to us emotionally and spiritually. And it works the opposite way as well. 
As I was praying and seeking God for my health a couple weeks ago, I came to the realization that this journey needs to change for me. I can't keep allowing the physical to distract me in my emotional and spiritual walk. I can't keep being half a person.

I have prayed earnestly for strength and healing in my life.
And I do believe that my God has a day appointed for me and for my full healing.
But, as I wait on Him.
As I trust Him with this area of life am I being obedient?
 Am I surrendering every area of my life to Him?
And yes, I really am talking about the food I put into my mouth.

I am inserting here that this is my own personal conviction that God is working out in my life.
So, by no means am I applying this to everyone.
But, I'm not like everyone.
My disease reacts directly to what I put into my mouth. It just does.

Galatians 5:22-23 talks about the fruits of the spirit. One of those being "self control". And I had to ask myself these questions in light of such heavy conviction: am I exhibiting self control when I willingly shove that doughnut into my mouth?
 Am I really bringing glory to God by choosing to eat things that I know beyond a shadow of a doubt will have an immediate negative effect on my body?
Am I fully surrendering my will and what I want to Christ in this area?
Or have I sectioned it off and simply done what I want the last eleven years without asking Him?
Each question held a painful answer.
I have been simply doing what I want.
Even though I am blessed enough to live in a time where I have knowledge and information that shows me a better way.
I had to come to the conclusion that I am not bringing glory to God when I feel physically bankrupt. Not to mention, this body is a gift. And how I treat it and take care of it does matter. There are a lot of things about this disease that are completely out of my control. My immune system attacked my pancreas. Alright, not much I can do about that one.
But, there are things I can work at, and having the disease itself is no reason to ignore that.

  I can't do anything without His strength. That fruit of the spirit, you know the one: self control. It is just that: a result of Him in me.
He works it out in me through my willingness to run after Him. He works it out in me by the power of His Word.
I can not make one lasting change in my health apart from His grace.
 I cannot do this alone in my strength.
I cannot break eleven years of bad patterns and bad decisions and just chains of perfection without Him.

So I am saying: "God if you will work this in me, by your power, I am going to be obedient. I am going to work at exhibiting self control in this area of my life. I am going to seek to bring you glory through whatever I do."

I am sharing all this with you as an act of accountability but also as an invitation.
 In the next couple days I am going to have a plan outlined here on the blog that goes into some specifics for what this looks like for me.
 But, if you would like to join me in this, whatever it may look like for you, I would love to be able to pray for you and be mutually encouraged.


"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self control..." : Galatians 5:22-23

4 comments:

  1. We have so much to talk about on Thursday. There are some ideas that I've been throwing around lately and I really think you might be interested in helping me iron them out and put them into some sort of action plan. Just remember God is so much stronger than any temptation that is out there. I've got your back, chica!

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    1. Thanks Cristy! I appreciate your encouragement! And I'm looking forward to getting together!

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  2. Hi visiting from Casey's blog decided to follow along. I love the honesty of your words and you do have a gift for writing! Looking forward to following along.

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    1. Hi Allison! Thank you for your kind words! I'm excited to have you here! :)

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