It has been quite a long time since I have last posted anything. Somewhat of a drought in the ability to write. But, that is what happens when one is busy searching for something to do with their time. In my case, looking for that job that has yet to appear to me.
I have had a lot of time to think though. Which I am not sure if I enjoy that or not. Too much time to think allows one to feel slightly insane versus thoughtful. Which I would prefer the latter. I am a planner. I like to plan. I like to write lists. I like to organize. And because of that, I have a slight tendency to have big plans for the future. Everyone has a vision of where they would like their life to go. I'm not sure if that qualifies me as a dreamer, because along with my planning remains my stark practicality that prevents me from reaching "too far".
So, I have been thinking a lot lately, about where I want to go. Where I want to be. And I can see the goal in the distance. Not to get all emo on everyone...but I sometimes feel it is very out of reach. That sinking feeling where one feels stuck and they are trying to push through. To be honest, I have felt that way when I look ahead towards my plans.
And then I remember this: "Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed." (Proverbs 16:3). I can not think of how many times I have worried about where I want to be. I have made the worry of my future plans a security blanket that I have a hard time shedding. It is so easy to become bound by worry. It so easy to become bound by the negativity that nothing is going to move.
And then I remember this: "...But the word of God is not bound!" (2 Timothy 2:9b ESV)
So whatever I feel in bondage to, whether it be my concern of the future, or my lack of job prospects, or even the thought of where I want to be: my future plans.....God's word is not bound. God is not bound. And He came to set me free. And there is power in speaking that into existence.
So, when I look at where I want to be and all the financial and situational things that need to happen. When I look at my plans for the future and the ideas that I have....when I take a hard look at my plans:it can seem stark. Almost unattainable. Unreachable. Not quite fathomable. Not practical. No reality. Too much.....
But then I remember.